little girl lost

G
perforated his skull with a bullet
and cured himself once and for all
of his addiction to alcohol

that was three years ago
and his daughter
has been drinking about it ever since

I saw her today
and couldn't help but think of her old man

my mind always returns to that tile floor
in the basement of their old house
where I used his mop
his towels
to wipe up
his blood
his brains

I had to make sure
his daughter didn't see
what her old man left behind
or more precisely
what was left of her old man

this morning she told me
she'd been sober the last four months
the alcohol on her breath
revealed the truth before she did

"I'm screaming for help
it's not four months
but four hours"
she finally confessed

then she began to cry
and between sobs
she said she wants to be done
but that I shouldn't worry

she just wants to be done

I told her I'd help her
but in the mean time
she needed to find a meeting
she agreed and said she'd look

that was nine hours ago

I don't know if she found one or not
I can't find her

now I'm lost